Guest Writer: Christine

So I had the strangest dream last night. It started out with me in labor although I don’t remember any pain. But I do remember them handing me a little boy who was actually not little at all, he was a very big baby that I don’t know how I gave birth to. And he had a ton of dark dark brown hair…darker than mine or yours. His hair was straight when he was born but that same day he was born it started to curl more and more until he had a little baby Helen-like fro going on…a mass of curly hair. And I remember sitting in bed and being so excited to tell you that we had a boy (yes, you were the dad and we were married) but you were in the waiting room…I don’t know why because I wanted you to be with me and I kept asking the doctor if you could come in and he kept saying no, but finally they let you come in but the nurse had already told you that it was a boy so I was disappointed I didn’t get to tell you…anyway, you were SO excited…like your face looked SO happy. And you came in to see me and you held the baby and then you put him down on the floor and he started walking right away…he wobbled just a little bit but he never even fell down, and everyone in the hospital was extremely amazed and everyone was like come see the newborn baby that just started walking. And then the nurse told me that I had my baby on February 12th…which I didn’t register until like an hour later was also my birthday. And then I was like, how long was I in labor?! Yay, I had a baby on my birthday. Then the nurse told us we had to name him before we left but I didn’t have any names picked out and neither did you and we weren’t liking anything we could think of at the moment and I just wanted to leave the hospital so you were like well, we will just make up a fake name that we can write down on the paper so the nurse sees something is written and we can leave but then we will name him later when we think of a good name. so you wrote down “lemon tart.” I have no idea what you were thinking! But anyway, we left the hospital. And he still didn’t have a name, but I remember when we got home I said something to you about naming him Theodore, which you absolutely did not go for. And then I remember saying that he looked like another baby I knew named brian, but that I didn’t want to name him brian. And that was that about names, he never did get a name in my dream. But he did get better at walking and at home we were still all so confused as to how he was walking so soon. And my mom or grammy was like, well, sometimes these things just happen, every baby is different and develops at their own pace. So then when we got home it was Christmas time (don’t ask, I know I had my baby in February), but we all had to get ready for Christmas dinner because we were having a ton of people over (random people…none of whom I know or could see faces of in the dream). And you were helping my mom and my grammy cook Christmas dinner. And I don’t know what perry was doing. I was taking care of the baby and resting so I was of no help. And Helen and grace were being goofy together. And we decided to eat in my parent back yard because it was oddly warm for Christmas time and we had a huge picnic table which could seat more guests than our dining room. It took the whole day to cook everything, and I remember we were having ham (blah). And finally all the guests came and everyone sat down to dinner and then you came and told me you had to go because mike and Jeremy were visiting and I said no you cant leave now we are about to sit down and have dinner and you were like but they traveled all this way and I was like well we have plenty of food why cant they eat dinner with us and you said they don’t want to they already went to Nathans and go hot dogs and I was like that’s it where are they, im going to have a talk with them. And you were like, they are in the garage. So I went out there and mike was actually billy but you were calling him mike and Jeremy was black with glasses and a big fro. And they both had their mouths full of the fattest hot dogs ever. And I was like listen (I was a feisty new mother with a little attitude), you need to get rid of those things and sit down and eat dinner with us right now before the food gets cold, and don’t think you can take my husband away from me on the same day that I just had a baby. And they were like, oh, ok, and they threw their hot dogs out and went and sat down at the picnic table. But then there were these random uninvited people walking down our drive way and I was like what now?! So first their was this Asian chic and a blonde and they were together and I was like go away and they were surprised I was so mean without even asking them what they wanted and then I felt bad and was like im sorry, what do you need? And I don’t remember what they asked for. But then there was this random guy who was being annoying and I told him to go away. And finally there was this pregnant woman sitting in the grass with her cell phone. And I was like what are doing here. And she was like my husband is at your Christmas party and he left me so I came here to text message him and try to get him to come back. And I don’t remember who her husband was but in my dream I knew him and was like, I didn’t know he was married or I would have invited you too. Well no way is he going to sit and eat Christmas dinner with us while his pregnant wife sits in the grass, and also no one better be text messaging under the picnic table. So I went and got him and dragged him over to his wife and told him to make up with her and take her over to sit down and have dinner with us. And that is all that I remember about my dream because then my alarm went off. Although I think I remembered quite a bit. (sorry that I have so many dreams in which we are married or having kids…I don’t know where most of this stuff comes from anyway). Its entertaining though, right? Haha.